Fox(NEW YORK) — Taken 3 may be this movie’s title, but the only thing taken here will be your money if you decide to pay to see what is the worst film in this franchise.
Liam Neeson reprises his role as the coolest AARP or CIA operative on the planet, Bryan Mills. Millsy (I’m going to call him Millsy) is framed for the murder of his wife, Lenore (Famke Janssen). She texts him that she’s coming over to his apartment and asks Millsy to pick up bagels. When he returns, she’s in his bed, dead. Millsy finds her body about 20 seconds after he picks up a bloody knife, stuck in the hallway floor outside the bedroom.
I’m going to rewind. A day or two earlier, Lenore paid Bryan (okay, I’ll call him Bryan) an unannounced visit. She walked right into his apartment because his door was open and unlocked. I’m not sure if Bryan saw the first two movies, but based on the all the people who wanted and still want to kill him, why in hell would he leave his door open? I know Bryan’s a tough guy, but COME ON.
About 30 seconds after he finds Lenore’s body, the cops swarm the apartment like bros swarming a beer pong table at a Dave Matthews concert. There’s no place to go except out the window, which is how Bryan makes his miraculous escape. But now he’s going to have to deal with police inspector Franck Dotzler (Forest Whitaker), whose intellectual crime-solving prowess involves eating bagels. I’m not kidding.
Also in the mix is Stuart (Dougray Scott), Lenore’s filthy-rich husband, as well as Bryan’s daughter, Kim (Maggie Grace), the woman who started this whole franchise six years ago by getting kidnapped, or “taken.”
Sure, there’s one exciting chase scene and some of the camerawork and stunts are impressive, but there’s zero substance in Taken 3. Franck chases Bryan, who’s out to prove he’s been framed, and man, is it boring and contrived. And though part of the fun of the Taken movies, by design, is seeing an older guy like Bryan kicking serious butt, this franchise, like Bryan himself, is showing its age.
One-and-a-half out of five stars.
Follow @ABCNewsRadio
Copyright © 2015, ABC Radio. All rights reserved.